You Hate the Dress Your Future Mother-in-Law Chose For Your Wedding. Should You Tell Her?

 Moms, Mother in Law, Mother of the Groom, Mother-of-the-Groom Dresses  Comments Off on You Hate the Dress Your Future Mother-in-Law Chose For Your Wedding. Should You Tell Her?
Oct 212015
 
things a mother of the bride should never do

Photo: New Line/Courtesy Neal Peters Collection

Whether you have the kind of relationship with your future mother-in-law that makes less-fortunate women go green with jealousy or one that mimics the horror stories we've watched on the big screen, chances are you don't welcome a confrontation with the woman who will soon be your family. And that's just one reason why hating the dress she's chosen to don on your big day can be super stressful.

But before you break down and confess your contempt for her attire, "balance your dream wedding with the possible damage you could do by telling her it's a horrible dress," warns April Masini, a relationship expert and advice columnist. If your wedding is more important than your future mother-in-law's feelings, then you know what to do — but buckle up for the long-term consequences."

See More: The Dos and Don'ts of Getting in Good with His Family

To predict the outcome of this uncomfortable conversation, look to "how she typically reacts to feedback like this," suggests Rachel Needle, licensed psychologist in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. "You might also want to think about how important this really is to you. Is this worth possibly hurting her feelings or creating tension? Chances are, it's not."

But if you simply can't allow that dress to make a cameo in your wedding photos, ease into the conversation with positive feedback, working any criticism into the middle of your approach, Needle suggests. Try out something like this: "'You know, you're much prettier than that dress shows,'' says Masini. "Then, if you've done the leg work, you can tell her, 'I saw an amazing dress that would really flatter your figure — here's the website for it — or, I've even asked them to hold it for you in case you want to try it on.'"

If you can keep perspective, the experts agree, on what this day is really about and whether your mother-in-law wears an inappropriate or distasteful dress will be less important. "Remember that this one day, while important, is to celebrate your love for your future partner and your commitment to each other," reminds Needle. "Most women fantasize about this day for their entire life and have very high expectations of what it should be like — but focus on the positive and what will be right and amazing about your wedding, as opposed to those things you are unhappy with, like your future mother-in-law's dress."

Oct 132015
 
Los Angeles Stores for Mother of the Brides Dresses

Photo: Courtesy of BHLDN

Your mother has supported you through all of the wedding planning meltdowns since the moment your soon-to-be-hubby slipped that ring on your finger, so she without a doubt deserves to look just as fabulous as you on the big day! With five-star service and designer wares, these Los Angeles boutiques cater to the one of the most important wedding attendees — your mom!

BHLDN
An offshoot of bohemian clothier Anthropologie, BHLDN has rapidly transformed into the ultimate boutique for budget-conscious and fashion-forward bridal parties. With pieces priced between $220 and $880, and a range of designs including thoughtful details such as lace overlay, floral motifs, and delicate beading, there is an option for every mother of the bride at the boutique's South Beverly Drive location. Read real brides' reviews here!

Barney's New York, Beverly Hills
Barneys is beloved in New York for its selection of cutting-edge designer wares, and the department store's Beverly Hills outpost offers an equally pleasing array of attire. Whether your mother prefers a simple Vera Wang sheath or an edgy Proenza Schouler design, this mega boutique's streamlined Wilshire Boulevard outpost is a go-to source for luxury.

Lili Bridals
55-year-old Lili Bridals is a staple in the Los Angeles area for its wide selection of gowns and accessories. Business owner Lisa Litt inherited the salon from her grandmother, and continues the company's legacy of courteous service. Mothers who adore gowns by the likes of Sue Wong, Montage, and Cameron Blake will find infinite options to slip into for their daughter's day. Read real brides' reviews here!

Trina Turk
If classic cocktail attire is the MOB's desired attire, Trina Turk's Manhattan Beach boutique has your sartorial bases covered. Lace, brocade, and floral prints are all in current rotation for the brand's Fall 2015 collection, allowing even the choosiest mothers a plethora of options.

See More: Get Your Bridal Party Gorgeous From Head to Toe with These L.A. Hair and Makeup Artists

Decades
Sometimes, modern attire simply doesn't satisfy one's sartorial cravings, and in such cases Los Angeles's much-adored vintage boutique Decades is the first place to look for options. Unlike local consignment stores or thrift shops, Decades vends labels ranging from Gucci and Hermes to Prada and Dior curated by owners Cameron Silver and Christos Garkinos for the fashion-forward MOB.

Monique Lhuillier
A classic on both coasts, Monique Lhuillier offers elegant, timeless attire for both the bride and her mother. The designer's signatures include lace-adorned, fitted frocks and heavy embellishment that can be worn for the big day and re-utilized for special occasions in the future. Read real brides' reviews here!

Nordstrom The Grove
Whether you're hunting for a simple cotton sarong or an elaborate, beaded confection, Nordstrom The Grove is a one-stop shop for mother of the bride options. Full-length numbers by Tadashi Shoji and Adrianna Papell mingle with designer creations by Burberry London, Tracy Reese, and Phillip Lim.

Browse even more bridal, bridesmaids, and mother-of-the-bride at these Los Angeles boutiques!

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Sep 152015
 
Moms Avoid Upstaging Bride

Photo: Lane Dittoe

Oh no, she didn't! Moms, if there's one thing you definitely don't want to do on your daughter or daughter-in-law's big day it's to have all eyes on you for all of the wrong reasons. It's your time to shine, yes, but there's a delicate balance between standing out from the rest of the crowd and upstaging the bride. So take our advice, and know your role. We swear you'll still look amazing and feel like a VIP too.

Don't wear white or anything close to it
Sorry, mom! As much as you love that light beige dress, it's probably not going to work out in your favor. Unless specifically requested by the bride, wedding planner Amy Shey Jacobs, President of Chandelier Events, strongly urges moms to steer clear of gowns in ivory, cream, champagne and anything remotely close to white, particularly if it's made of lace.

Keep it classy
Just to be clear moms, the bride is the only one who should be bringing sexy back but that doesn't mean you can't dress to impress. Simply stay away from plunging necklines and anything backless or super short, warns San Francisco-based wedding planner Amy Nichols of Amy Nichols Special Events. "While you may have killer legs or a sculpted back, today is the day to let your daughter take the spotlight."

Stick to your regular beauty routine
Otherwise, you may wind up stealing the bride's thunder, and no, not in a good way! "Whether it's your first spray tan, last-minute botox or fillers that could backfire or something even more significant, don't use the wedding as an excuse to justify dyeing your hair platinum blonde, getting plastic surgery or whatever it is," cautions Nichols. Beauty extremes right before the wedding are always a big no-no.

See More: 4 Things to Remember If You Let Your Bridesmaids Choose Their Own Accessories

Don't veer from the game plan
That means no impromptu speeches unless your daughter specifically asks you to or surprise choreographed dance numbers, and definitely keep your alcohol consumption in check, advises Nichols. "Of course it's a wedding and you'll want to have fun, but you don't want the "story" from the wedding to be about you."

Put on a happy face
As Jacobs explains, your daughter's joy is absolutely reflective of those around her. "So even if it isn't the song you would have chosen for her to walk down the aisle to or the flower design you would have dreamed up, make every effort to smile and show approval of the planning choices she made." Your happiness will be contagious.

Aug 112015
 

Looking for a dress that doesn't scream mother-of-the-bride? Here are the best Chicago boutiques to find something she'll want to wear — and you'll want to borrow.

Dimitra's Bridal Couture
One of our favorite boutiques for wedding dresses also hosts an extensive selection of sophisticated black-tie evening gowns. Full-length dresses boasting gorgeous beadwork and lace embroidery by designers like Ysa Makino, Stephen Yearick and Rene Ruiz will have mom feeling like a red carpet starlet. Read real brides' reviews here!

VMR
Kick back and relax in VMR's minimalist showroom, knowing full-well that the storage closet is absolutely overflowing with a selection of designer apparel and well-curated vintage pieces from Givenchy, Louis Vuitton and more. Trust us, we've seen it first-hand, and letting the team of stylists do the digging to find your perfect look is a wedding gift for mom.

Mira Couture
Mira Couture is known for its selection of unique wedding gown designers, but with names like Pronovias Barcelona and Elie Saab, the evening and cocktail attire is perfect for finding a one-of-a-kind gown for mom. But if that dream dress isn't on the floor, Mira Couture will create an entirely custom gown that is truly a perfect fit. Read real brides' reviews here!

Marlowe
This luxury Italian brand known for its cashmere delivers elegant and simple pieces that appeal to mom's comfort level, but are also modern and chic to appease your tastes. If Jackie O and Julianne Moore had a fashion baby, it might look something like the refined, stylish clothes at Marlowe.

See More: Find the Best Bakery to Whip Up Your Dream Wedding Cake Here!

Ikram
Named for owner Ikram Goldman, this upscale women's boutique is highly regarded as one of the best in the world for a unique mix of designers — Azzedine Alaïa, Proenza Schouler, Thakoon and Lanvin — a killer shoe selection and irresistible accessories. Everything's hand-picked by Ikram, and if you're lucky, you might snag a styling sesh with the icon — her office is nestled near the fitting rooms and she keeps a watchful eye.

Neapolitan Collection
This North Shore boutique is known for its Christian Dior shop-in-shop and range of designers, from Alexander McQueen and Valentino to Derek Lam and Victoria Beckham. As one of the go-to places for unique, fashion-forward gowns and accessories perfect for black-tie events and charity galas, Neapolitan will undoubtedly dress mom as a knockout.

Carolina Herrera Chicago
Few designers capture elegance and femininity like Carolina Herrera. The designer herself oozes grace and sophistication, and whether mom needs a killer dress or effortless looks for a full weekend, these are pieces you're going to be stealing down the road.

Peruse more places to find mom's perfect dress on our Chicago Bridal Salons page!

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BRIDES Florida: Where to Shop for Mother-of-the-Bride Dresses in Miami

 Florida, Local, Miami, Moms, Mother-of-the-Bride Dresses, Mother-of-the-Groom Dresses  Comments Off on BRIDES Florida: Where to Shop for Mother-of-the-Bride Dresses in Miami
Aug 052015
 
Miami Mother of the Bride Dresses Bridal Salons

Photo: Courtesy of Wonderland Bridal Couture

The mother of the bride is right up there with the maid of the honor and deserves to look just as fabulous. Treat mom and your future mother-in-law to a stylish fitting session at one of these five bridal boutiques specializing in dresses and suits designed just with mom in mind.

Wonderland Bridal Couture
The South Florida-based bridal boutique offers up a range of classic choices for mothers of the bride and groom, from draped dressed to structured suits. The Cameron Blake collection showcases sophisticated styles that highlight mom's elegant figure without bearing too much skin, featuring a matching jacket or shawl to polish off the look. Read real brides' reviews here!

Leggenda Bridal
Moms who want to make a statement will love perusing the collection of dresses at another one of Miracle Mile's top bridal boutiques, Leggenda. Elaborate beadwork, sweetheart necklines and mermaid skirts are just the start, with prices ranging from $250 to $1,250 — plus immediate alterations ready for next-day pick-up if you're in a 'sitch. Read real brides' reviews here!

Le Beau Maroc
Brides looking to give mom a bohemian style for the ceremony can choose from the finest silk gowns at the newly opened Surfside boutique, Le Beau Maroc. Started by a young Moroccan who now calls Miami home, Asmaa Benkirane's brings the country's chic couturiers stateside with collections that have catered to royalty and Moroccan elite and fabrics hailing from the houses of Dior, Valentino, Yves Saint Laurent and Pucci.

See More: Still Searching for that Perfect First-Dance Song? Browse Through Dozens of Miami Wedding Bands Here!

Camille La Vie
The Doral outpost at Miami International Mall has a bevy of mother-of-the-bride gowns in its boutique that will mesh perfectly with the bride's style. From shawl collars concealing A-line dresses to sequined V-neck and floor-length taffeta beauties, mom is sure to look stunning by your side.

Bellissima Bridal
Make dress shopping just as special for mom as it was for you by sampling the latest designs Bellissima has to offer for mothers of the bride and groom. The Miracle Mile boutique showcases sophisticated styles decked out with touches of rhinestones, Swarovski crystals and lace so mom will look super stylish on your big day. Read real brides' reviews here!

Want to see even more? Check out our Miami Dresses page to get mom all gussied up for the big day!

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Jun 112013
 
mother-of-the-bride-mother-of-the-groom-coordinating-dresses-197

Photo: Kate Webber Photography

Whether mom wants to coordinate with your closest gal pals or select a dress that makes her stand out on her own, our wedding etiquette experts are here to answer your mother-of-the-bride (and groom!) dress questions in our daily post.

What's the dress-buying protocol for moms? Should my mom and my fiancé's mother coordinate outfits?

Back in the day, the bride's mother would pick her dress first—usually, it complemented the bridesmaid's gowns—then inform the groom's mom so she could coordinate. You could go that route, or you could give them a break and let each pick an outfit she looks and feels great in. But feel free to set some parameters (level of formality, colors you'd prefer they not wear, etc.).

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